“the goal is not to be perfect parents but its to become progressively less stupid parents!” – Dr Marshall Rosenberg
Excerpt from Raising Children Compassionately
Before I start reading the book, I must admit, the goal was to be a perfect parent to my child, but Dr Marshall puts it out for me – we just can’t be perfect! He faces the same challenges like all parents do. It is odd how we know we can’t be perfect yet we can’t stop striving to be one.
Still – it is definitely a better goal than perfect – be progressively less stupid!
Now.. I think that will be call wisdom, isn’t it?
It is harder to be kind than to be clever
-quote from Jeff Bezo’s grandfather to him
I find this quote particularly relevant to me at this juncture of my life vs 20 years ago. Is it because I have a child? or what I have experience throughout my 42 years? I am not sure but yes, I will like to share this to my daughter whenever I can.
It takes a village to raise a child
-from an African Proverb
Read this somewhere before but today it is with more impact because my ex-Uni mate who is a widower with 2 young kids in tow were in the papers, sharing her experiences and mostly for readers to celebrate the woman’s strength. She quoted the above. I love that she was truthful, that she has a lot of support from family, church community & friends. Definitely something to ponder about our social circle.
Abandon your expectations
Got this from a write up on “6 practices to boost your chances of success in life & business”.
Right.. obviously the writer didn’t face unexpected scenarios like the real people in a “not exactly 3rd world country but yet to be 1st world country that practices fake democracy”. Would he/she would have abandon him/her expectations for the employees to turn up for work everyday? And he/her will celebrate if everyone turns up for work on a working day?
I will always wish for the best for people I don’t care or know, why wouldn’t I be?
Now.. I may sound like I am such a ‘wonderful’ being for saying that but really – it is not. My reason stems from a much selfish reason – ie does not affect me. Why I say so.. think about this – say you saw someone met an accident (something bad happen to a stranger) & you are there – don’t you feel compel to help? The answer is yes definitely – which in turn means you will be late to whatever you plan to do. Or say someone you don’t care got into a bad patch with in the ‘finance’ department – again you are compel to ‘pitch’ in or get yourself embroiled into (not that it was voluntary!) so… see… I am that selfish. So here I will like to wish again for today & everyday after –
I WISH FOR EVERYONE TO BE FREE OF BAD SHIT HAPPENING TO THEM EVERYDAY!
yippee yea yea for me!
“Orang boleh pandai setinggi langit,” Pramoedya wrote in “Rumah Kaca” (The Glasshouse), “tapi selama ia tidak menulis, ia akan hilang di dalam masyarakat dan dari sejarah.” (Your intellect may soar to the sky but if you do not write, you will be lost from society and to history.)
Thoughts to ponder isn’t it? Usually the highly intellectuals do write. I must go find this Rumah Kaca book!
“We forge the chains we wear in life.” ― Charles Dickens
How true. We DO forge our own chains don’t we? I often wonder why I must have a set of expectations or why I insist on doing what is deem the best?
But then without chains, what will we be like? Or really – why are they deemed as chains? Can’t they be the ‘lifeline’ to a better path less we stray?